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Aaaaaah.. at last, a great first-person shooter that is just about killing everything in the fucking level. I missed the days of original Doom and Hexen where you just kill everything and you are satisfied. That’s how I feel about Painkiller.
This game, first of all, has incredible graphics. The level designs are so incredible and the main thing is that every single level is different. First level is a cemetery, then you jump to a church, or to an icy bridge, a castle, a broken down town, swamp. Everything in every level is new.
Another great addition to this game is the great weaponry that you get. The weapon you begin with is the Painkiller weapon. It reminds me of the bottom of a lawnmower. The primary attack is just a couple of blades flip up and spin around super fast and rip everything into garden salad. The secondary attack shoots the spikes out and when it hits an enemy it grabs them and rips them toward you. Also if the thing hits a wall it creates like an energy line from the base of the gun and the spikes and rips up everything that goes past the line.
The first weapon you pick up is a badassed shotgun that has a secondary ice attack that turns the monster to ice for a few moments. Handy for this big fucking demons that have sawed off shotguns *wink* *wink*.
Next weapon is the ultra badassed stake gun. It acts like a giant crossbow, but instead of wimpy bolts it shoots giant fucking stakes that when they hit a monster, it picks the monster up and will stick them to the wall or floor behind them. The secondary attack shoots a grenade for some fucking reason. Its all cool, though.
After this gun you get a fucked up sort of shuriken gun. It shoots these shurikens out extremely fast and fucks up puts the demons shit in ruins. The secondary to this gun shoots a giant fucking lighting beam that toasts those demon fucks.
The final is probably the baddest combination of any weapons. It’s a primary rocket launcher with a gatling gun for a secondary… Talk about killing everything in the fucking room with only one gun….
The story line to the game is pretty bland but still badass… A guy and his wife are killed in some car accident. But, for some reason the guy is sent to Purgatory and has to serve this one badassed looking angel dude. He tells you that you have been brought here for some weird reason they never explain. But your duty is to stop Lucifer and his generals from advancing toward Heaven and taking over. Lucifer is trying to be sneaky and materialize his demons in Purgatory so they can be closer to Heaven for the attack. So you are sent to kill the demons and destroy the generals of Lucifer’s army. A hitman for hire for Heaven so to speak.
It’s a very entertaining game to play and after every level, I kept going farther and farther, not wanting to stop until I killed the next general. So if your into a game all about violence and kicking the shit out of everyone, then play this.
P.S. You also meet this hot character Eve who is naked the entire game except for the fact that her hair covers her tits. Its still cool!
-– El Matt
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